Professional Assistant Coaches

While we were on the topic of assistant coaches in Class 5, Tracy Hartley, doula and owner of the local B.E.S.T. Doula Service, shared with us about how to work with your hospital birth team to obtain your desires. This is an important topic since sometimes couples who take the Bradley Method classes sometimes feel that their desires differ from the normal hospital policy or the doctor's way of doing things. Hopefully the couple will have prepared ahead of time and openly discussed their desires with their doctor, decided which if any things will be compromised, and written up a clear birth plan (of course, knowing that flexibility is a necessity in childbirth).

One of her tips to use a compliment as a way of stating your preference for something that the doctor may or may not usually support. For example, she told how she had used this tactic with a doctor who alway wants his laboring moms to give birth on their back, legs in stirrups. This position is known to be the worst possible position for comfort of the laboring woman and the ease of exit for the baby, but is the easiest position for the doctor to see and catch. So Tracy kindly said to the OB as the mom was about to start pushing, "Thank you so much for supporting her choice to use an alternative position for giving birth!" He looked surprised and confused, but then didn't make her get on her back! It worked!

While Bradley coaches are trained to be the primary support for the laboring woman, there is something special that another woman can offer. If you have more questions about doulas, their services, costs, benefits, or how to go about hiring a doula, feel free to contact Tracy or visit her website, search for a good fit from the 300+ doulas in DASC (Doulas of Southern California), or let me know.

Finally, Tracy offers to all childbirthing women, the opportunity to participate in The Letters Project. It is basically a personal letter drafted to the hospital administrator where you plan to or have given birth, telling him/her your birth preferences. Simply select your preferences from scroll down menus, edit if desired, print, stick a stamp on it and mail it. The hospitals won't know your preferences if you don't let them know! Let's be part of the change in hospitals offering more choices to birthing women! I just did it and it only take a few minutes!

C-section video

We didn't have time to view a C-section video in class, but in the unlikely event that you have one, you may want to see one.

Seed in the belly

As I stated in class, I'm not a big into celebrating Halloween, however, if you're going to dress up slash dress up your kids, this is the day to do it, right? And since our Class 5 fell on Oct. 31st, we did it in style. Our absolutely awesome couple, Sierra & Charlie, won the "Best-Dressed Couple" Contest! They also brought homemade vegan pumpkin muffins to share with everyone. 

They informed us that Charlie was the farmer that put the seed in Sierra's belly! P.S. The dread locks are for real :) And yes, there is an actual baby bump under there somewhere!


And they won... a whoopie cushion! J/K- it is an old fashioned hot water bottle, which can be used as a warm compress as we learned in class that can be an effective comfort tool in labor (and throughout pregnancy, or anytime actually, hot or cold). 

Coaches- it is your job to get one of these if your wife/partner would like to try this a comfort measure! 

If you do decide to use a good old hot water bottle, make sure you use hot tap water (not boiling water that could crack the container) and fill it 2/3 full. Securely close the stopper and dry off the bottle completely. Then, make sure turn it upside down over the sink and check for leaks.


While I normally like to link to where you can purchase these types of things for yourself, this particular one I bought from CVS (about $11). I don't want to link to any particular item since there are mixed reviews on most of them and I haven't tried any of them except this one.


We had a great first labor rehearsal! Wonderful job, beautiful moms and attentive coaches!

And now, for those of you who missed it, a quick pic of my two little puppies (a Dalmatian and a pink poodle) who made a brief appearance before class.

Time for Coach to Relax

The tables are turned in Class 3 and instead of coaches focusing on helping their pregnant partners to relax, coaches get to appreciate the importance of relaxation and a good coach to help you get there. Pregnancy is such a wonderful time for both parents to soak up time with each other before the baby arrives. Make sure to enjoy this precious time with the one that you love.


Although it is not a good for pregnant women to lay on their backs for long periods of time, we have the coaches lay on their backs for this one. The pregnant partner tailor sits with the back of the coach's head on a pillow in her lap, his body extending straight away from her. She SLOWLY goes through the following head/neck/shoulder massage using slow and deliberate touch to help with physical relaxation. I've written it all out completely rather than using (3x, etc.) for ease of use if you do read it aloud.
...


Say "hello" to the face with a gentle touch of the fingertips over the face.


Neck and Shoulders
Gently stroke neck, shoulders, and back of head.
Gently stroke neck, shoulders, and back of head.
Gently stroke neck, shoulders, and back of head.
With fingertips bent, stroke neck, shoulders, and back of head, digging into the muscles of the neck and shoulders.
With fingertips bent, stroke neck, shoulders, and back of head, digging into the muscles of the neck and shoulders.
With fingertips bent, stroke neck, shoulders, and back of head, digging into the muscles of the neck and shoulders.
Gently stroke neck, shoulders, and back of head.


Face
Smooth across the forehead, massaging temples in circles with thumbs.
Smooth across the forehead, massaging temples in circles with fingertips.
Stroke across the eyebrows with thumbs, ending in circles at temples.
Stroke under the eyes with thumbs, ending in circles at temples.
Stroke down the nose and across the cheeks, ending in circles with fingertips.
Stroke across the mouth areas, ending in circles with fingertips.
Using your hands, deeply massage the jaw, chin and cheeks.
Feel around the ears with fingers.
Massage ears with palms.
Trace convolution (shape of ear), shut off sound, and retrace.
Massage area of head behind the ears.


Finishing strokes
Gently stroke neck, shoulders, and back of head.
Gently stroke neck, shoulders, and back of head, end by squeezing head gently between hands.
Gently stroke neck, shoulders, and back of head, ending with head cupped in hands, then...
Lift and lower head very slowly.
Lift and lower head very slowly.
Lift and lower head very slowly.
Rotate head side to side very slowly.
Rotate head side to side very slowly.
Rotate head side to side very slowly.
Lower head down to pillow very slowly.
Cover the eyes with fingers resting gently on eyelids for a few moments to allow meditation.
Slowly, place flat palms very close to the face without touching.
Lift hands very slowly, while you allow the person to re-enter at his own pace.


Adapted from The Bradley Method® Teacher's Manual material r246 (from Laurel Institute, Incorportated)

Relaxation Poem

We discuss mental relaxation in Class 4 as one of the three important ways to practice and learn to relax: physical, mental and emotional. I want to share the poem that we read during our relaxation practice in Class 4, as a sample of something to relaxing on which to focus your mind. 

Coaches - It is a great idea to gather some poems, verses, and/or book passages that your wife/parter would enjoy hearing you read both during relaxation practice throughout pregnancy as well as during early labor. Another wonderful idea is to write a letter together (or two letters separately) to your unborn baby about how excited you are to welcome him/her to the outside world. This could be a wonderful encouragement and relaxation for a mom to hear her coach read this aloud to remind her of the beautiful work and important purpose of what her body is doing to bring your baby from life on the inside of her womb to life in your arms together.


P.S. The poem was written to be read during class to the couple, but I've included a few words to exchange when the coach is reading to his partner in [brackets]. And remember to read VERY SLOWLY, pausing frequently, softly, and in a low voice.
...


Let your whole being
sink slowly, slowly, slowly,
Feel your muscles
becoming limp and loose and comfortable.
Drifting or floating,
relaxed and comfortable,
warmth and heaviness spread through your body.
The baby in your uterus
is warm and heavy.
Feel warmth and heaviness
spreading from the baby to your abdomen, hips
thighs, knees, lower legs, ankles,
feet and toes.
Slowly, the lower half of you is
loose and limp,
warm and heavy.


The upper half of you awaits its turn.
Slowly release, let go,
warm and heavy,
limp and loose.
Let every cell absorb and enjoy,
spreading up back and front,
chest and shoulders.
Arms and hands and fingers let go.


As your neck releases tension,
your head slowly shifts and becomes
more and more relaxed.
Nearer and nearer that comfortable state of
relaxation.


Erase the worries from your brow,
eyes loose but closed.
Eyes and all around the eyes
limp and loose.
Cheeks loosen and droop,
jaw drops.
Tongue is loose in your mouth,
lips part slightly.
Warm, heavy, and comfortable.


Deep slow, heavy breathing.
Breathe in and out slowly,
abdomen up an down slowly.
Limp and loose,
warm and heavy,
comfortably relaxed.


In your mind's eye...
hold a softly purring kitten in your lap
while sunshine warms you [us] both.
Listen to the laughter of children
sledding on a crisp sparkly snowy hill.
Ride a bicycle on a lazy autumn afternoon,
hair blowing in the wind.
Sit before a roaring, snapping fire
with a red shiny apple ready to eat.
Watch a robin build her nest,
weaving string and straw with precision.
Lie on the warm sand, you and your love [me],
while the waves roll up on the beach.


Limp and loose,
warm and heavy,
comfortable and relaxed.


by Rhondda Evans Hartman
© AAHCC

More to Birth than Mechanics

While The Bradley Method® spends a lot of time teaching about the mechanics of birth, we also teach how to support as well as the importance of supporting mothers throughout pregnancy, labor and birth. There is so much to learn about the amazing process that the mother's body (and baby too!) goes through, that sometimes unfortunately we, as moms, can underestimate the transforming and empowering experience that giving birth is.


Bradley Ferner, a Birthing from Within childbirth mentor, writes about having realistic expectations, while trying turn societal messages that ignore the profound wonder in the experience of childbirth upside down in this article.

Book Review - Natural Childbirth the Bradley Way

If you'd like to do some additional reading about natural birth mechanics in addition to your Bradley Method classes, check out Natural Childbirth the Bradley Way by Susan McCutcheon. A word of warning that it does have some pictures (although they are circa 1975, made obvious by the lovely ladies' hairstyles and men's mustaches) with intimate views, if you know what I mean. There are great step-by-step instructions and contraction rehearsals for coaches and moms.


If I were going to recommend just one book in addition to attending class, this would be it. By the way, if you're going to buy it and use Amazon click through my site to support me at no cost to you!


Comment or email me to let me know if you read it and what you think!